Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it--he will be blessed in what he does.
-James 1:22-25 God's Word is the only thing that will give freedom. Sometimes there is so much bondage in our lives that we cannot even imagine living an obedient life to Christ. God desires to completely renew us from the inside out. God wants to starve us from the tendencies we have in human flesh that create destruction in our lives and He wants to to teach us new habits that will bring freedom and joy. God wants to use His Word to teach us these new habits but we have to submit to His authority completely in order to experience the liberty He sets before us. Without the Holy Spirit controlling our lives, we cheat ourselves through being in nothing but rebellion. In Isaiah 30:15 the Lord says, "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it." We are stubborn people who want to be the boss of ourselves. We think we know best for our own lives and we fall into selfishness of what we want. We put ourselves into slavery and bondage when we are rebellious children of God. We receive liberty from Christ the moment we receive Him as our Savior. However, if the internal gift of liberty is not release externally through obedience, we may possibly never truly experience it.
I think about my own life and how much rebellion I have gone through. Even after accepting Christ, I still wanted nothing of God's strength because I thought I could do well on my own. I was seeking rest from depression through the world. I was not experiencing true rest because I was not applying God's Word in my life. I saw even more destruction in my life because of this rebellion. I even realize how my stubbornness has affected me now. Even though drinking and disordered eating were the biggest times of rebellion to God's Word, there are still hints of rebellion in my life everyday. God's Word tells me to love others above myself and show the gospel in everything I do. I don't always love people around me to the extent that Christ calls me to. Why? I still fear being rejected. Paul reminds me in Philippians 1:29 that I "have been granted for Christ's sake, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake." Following God's Word and His deep commands will sometimes come with suffering. If I truly want to be Christ-like, I should expect to be rejected from some, maybe most. If I am truly following Christ and His example, I should rejoice in rejection and suffering because that means the enemy is working that much harder to be against me. I think about my future plans and how rebellion can come from them. If my plans are not lining up with God's Word and His commands, my plans are nothing but selfish desires. Selfishness only leads to pure destruction of God's beautiful creation. I don't want to be rebellious, especially in my plans for after school. I truly desire to be doing God's work in everything I do. I believe that rebellion will only leave me being alone as I wander through this wilderness. I would love to be a wife to a pastor and have 4 kids and be able to be involved in ministry in a church in some capacity whether working with youth or women. There are legitimate desires that I have but if any hint of these desires is selfishness, I want nothing of them. These desires sound like a great opportunity to help in furthering God's Kingdom but they could also be a cause of rebellion if at any point I put them above God's true plan. The Lord has done a lot of refining in my heart and I honestly do not think desires such as these or desires similar to doing full time ministry after college are not of God. I do believe in His blessing and His desire to bless. However, I am continually called to be obedient in anything the Lord brings me to.
The Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. -2 Corinthians 3:17
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